Where I Find You

I find it constantly amusing how God seems to pop up everywhere. Especially, I've noticed more recently, in music. Lately I feel as though I never hear a love song as that. I hear it as a God song. The object of affection in the song is never an earthly man for me, it's God. I'll be the first to admit this could have something to do with the 20th anniversary I recently celebrated. Or maybe not. Maybe I am just growing more and more in tune to God in my life, what He wants for me, what He has been planning. Maybe I am FINALLY completely content with being just who I am, an independent entity. I am me. I am not his boyfriend. I am not the girl he is talking to. I am not her best friend. I am me, Aimee Belcher, child of God.

... and you know? I am finally okay with that. I don't need anyone else. I don't need anything else. I think I've finally found who I am and I could not be more excited. I knew 2009 was going to be a good year!

Who Am I?

I heard an interesting quote the other day...

"She doesn't really have a true identity, but she knows 

what she believes in and she sticks to that."

Something about that quote struck me. Perhaps it's because I often wonder who I am. Some people seem so sure of who they are, where they're going, what they are meant to be. I, on the other hand, know none of that. Who am I? I wish I could tell you but even I don't know. I feel as though I change based on who I am around. Often times I trick myself into thinking I have figured out which is the real me. But is that just who I want to be, or is it truly who I am? And where does one draw the line between who they want to be and who they are. Can I not choose who I want to be? Am I not the master of my own person, free to be who I want to be? Sometimes I think I know where I'm going and what I'm meant to be. Graphic Designer. Journalist. Lover of the Spanish language. Future magazine employee. Internship in Boulder. Job for Disney. Sure, they may be possibilities, but who is to say where I will truly be when I graduate. I graduate in three and a half years. Three and a half years ago I had a completely different career path in mind. Who is to say I won't change my mind before graduation? 

But really? We all know where this is going. I have no control. It doesn't matter what I want, what I think, what I feel. It's all up to the man upstairs. I may have found that I am a talented graphic designer, but really? That was not my doing. God gave me that talent. He has put the right people and experiences in my life at just the right times so I think that I have figured out my perfect life plan and career path but who am I trying to kid. He's been knowing that since way before my time. Since way before time itself, in fact. 

So though I may have no true identity, I know what I believe in, and that's plenty enough for me. God bless you.

How Will They Remember Me?

I often sit and ponder my future. Here I am, a sophomore in college, and I know EXACTLY what I want to do with my life. Dual major in Graphic Design and Journalism with a minor in Spanish. Internship in Dallas, Atlanta or NYC. Job with a big name magazine. But why? How will my life affect the lives of those around me? The lives of my peers? The lives of my elders? The lives of future generations? How can I, Aimee Belcher, make a difference? It is something I struggle with on a daily basis. I try my best to live the life that God has so graciously blessed me with to it's fullest and to share His love with those around me. I want to have Godliness seeping from my pores. I want people to think I'm different and KNOW why. But how do I work that into my future? If I work for a christian magazine, I only reach out and touch those who already consider themselves christians. I want to do more. I want to bring light to those who have only darkness. I want to bring love to those who feel only hate and neglect. I want to bring happiness to those who can find only sorrow. I want to bring hope to those who can not get past their regrets. I want to leave a legacy.